Yikes- 2 days to go!

My streak of practicing the opposite of NaBloPoMo (NaNoBloPoMo perhaps?) continues as December gallops toward its end.  Just too many things going on and too much stuff inside my head.

The holidays are right up there, of course.  Making sure we have all of the gifts, that they're wrapped and in order for all of the parties we have to attend.  (The last one was today, yippeee!)  The house is clean for guests, the grocery list made.  Just a quick trip to the grocery store and some easy baking and we're truly ready.  Wow.

The biggest issues, as always, have centered around the boy.  It's like the excitement of the month has caused a major backwards trend and it's been a real struggle.  It's been tough to deal with and even tougher to see him struggle with himself.  I never imagined how heartbreaking it was to see your child struggle with classmates comments and his own perception of himself and his behaviors.  If that makes no sense, I apologize.  It's late but I really just want to jot some thoughts down so I actually might elaborate on them down the road. 

Digression:  see, almost every night before bed I think of a million things I want to write about.  I write these amazingly funny and touching blog posts in my head but they disappear in the light of the morning or fade with the craziness of the day.  So I turned the computer on tonight and while it's not touching or funny, at least it's words and they make me feel better at least.

Anyhow, as much as I love the holidays and seeing my children enjoying them, this year has been truly bittersweet.  Instead of reveling in the joyful faces, I'm watching closely, studying how the chaos and excitement actually effects my child, causing stress and overexciting him to the point of pretty rough behavior.  I see him struggle with focusing on opening gifts instead bursting with energy and jumping out of his skin.  I see dark bags forming under eyes - not from waiting up for Santa but from the interrupted sleep by bad dreams about friends being mean and the stress of being good this time of year.

It's amazing how your perspective can change so much in one year.